PARENTS' ATTACHMENT FOR THEIR CHILDREN.

Children are the most affected victims of attachment exhibited by their parents. Parents' love for their children has metamorphosed into dreadful attachment. This is happening universally because of the selfish trait in parents. Few can claim to be free from parents' compulsive attachment to their kids. However well-meaning they be, their attachment turns the parent-child  relationship sour, traumatising families with constant confrontation followed by the invariable separation. Blissfully unaware of the consequences, parents continue to dote on their beloved ones. Parents' attachment to their children manifests in two distinct ways:

1. Opulent parents pamper their children by showering upon them money and gadgets, amenities and facilities. The children are thus saturated with luxuries and lose their joy content.
2. Another class of parents manifest their attachment through possessiveness towards their children. They virtually pester them with constant instructions and directions. They turn into control freaks. And their directives invariably fall short of reason or judgment.

In the first manifestation, parents indiscriminately shower money and sensual objects upon the kids without restriction. The pampering starts with toys, tricycles and bicycles, later with Ferraris, Yachts, Jets - the works. Through indulgence in luxuries, kids lose direction and purpose in life. It corrodes and ruins their lives. Neither parents nor kids conceive the negative effects of such indulgence, that it could lead one to a state of neutralisation. A state where one loses any pleasure and joy derived from sense objects. One could even become so bored that one is driven to commit serious blunders, even suicide. Nevertheless, well-meaning parents continue to pamper their children with sensual luxuries not realising the possible impending damage to them.

With regard to the second manifestation, parents' attachment and possessiveness traps their kids in an iron casket. The kids are fettered, shackled by forceful directions and instructions. And when parents constantly dictate doctrines and dogmas to the kids to the extreme, the children reach a point where they cannot take it any more. Children buckle under the pressure. Then one of two dreadful consequences follows. Children become either vegetables or rebels!

Becoming a vegetable means that the kid turns inert, inactive. And would hardly react to the external world. The kid reaches this state if his nature is passive and submissive and succumbs to the continuous onslaughts of his parents' directions and dictations. If, however, the kid is vocal and aggressive, he becomes a rebel. He would argue, swear, counter the unsolicited advices showered upon him. Further protest, turn violent, even leave home.

In either case, it is a curse upon innocent children to turn them into a vegetable or needless rebel in the prime of their youth. It may sound ironic but the fact remains that this trauma emanates from well-wishing, well-meaning, caring parents!

Parents ought to realise the blunder that their love and care lack the support of a strong intellect. And their rigid controls flow from their emotional attachment rather than a discerning intellect. They must visualise the damage done  and the dire necessity of developing the intellect in themselves and their children.

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